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I always think of my friend Tim when I cite the line from Deadwood: "Everything changes; don't be afraid." And here I am again, looking ahead to what is, quite likely, a new start. Again. I won't go into much detail now; it's too soon to say what's going to happen. Or rather, I can say that, whether or not this one particular thing that I can't yet write about happens, things are indeed changing here. I'm starting a big new writing project in 6 weeks.

And this weekend, I'm running another half marathon.

That's not really new. That's actually the culmination of a plan I put in motion last year. Although this will be HM #2, it's actually the one I'd planned on doing first, the one I signed up for on the heels of running my very first 5K in March of last year. It's across the Bay Bridge, which feels Quite Symbolic.

So that means this week is a taper week, where I sit on the couch a lot and reckon with how very much my mental health is tied up in maintaining a frenetic pace of activity, of training. Although my brain says "stay busy," my body is definitely ready for the break. On Tuesday's final speed workout, I really pushed myself, and then when I went into the gym a few hours later, I had the worst workout of my life. Every lift was terrible. I failed a bench press for the first time. (It wasn't a big deal; I had the safeties set and wasn't crushed by the barbell or anything. I could wriggle my way out from under it.)

On Saturday, Kin and I ate out at Yonsei Handrolls again. The first time we were there, we were really blown away, but this time around, I was a little disappointed. Perhaps my expectations were just too high; rather, I think, the quality had dipped rather dramatically. The wagyu beef was chewy; it's not supposed to be chewy. I cannot handle chewy meat at all.

(Saturday was "Bagel Day," and I will say that Boichik Bagels continue to be chewy. And that's perfect —4 exactly how a bagel is supposed to be.)

I read Virginia Sole-Smith's book The Eating Instinct last year, and it made me think about all sorts of issues surrounding our cultural and personal expectations of eating (and, particularly as a mom, of feeding others). I finished her latest book Fat Talk last night; I'll post a book review over on Substack today or tomorrow — that's where you'll find me writing more etc etc etc. I'll just say here that it's probably The Must Read book for parents and grandparents in helping them not be utterly toxic to their kids vis-a-vis bodies and diet culture.

Audrey Watters


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Audrey Watters

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